butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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