And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
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As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
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I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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