I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize