omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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