I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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