Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
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