There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Someone shattered a urinal.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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