woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
My pussy is not your playground.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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