so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
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omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I am naked and annoyed.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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