How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize