i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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