Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize