Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(254): View more from Texas

I see lights

(512): View more from Texas

Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.

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(254): I see lights (512): Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home. http://tfl.nu/1708

Replies (5) Good night (1194) Bad night (414)
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(847): View more from Illinois

is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?

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(847): is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder? http://tfl.nu/zxu8

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(503): View more from Oregon

it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.

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(503): it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers. http://tfl.nu/k78j

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(305): View more from Florida

I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"

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(305): I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez" http://tfl.nu/8edj

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.

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(401): after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now. http://tfl.nu/y18v

Replies (160) Good night (13086) Bad night (1648) Order T-Shirt
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(312): View more from Illinois

Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.

(1-312): View more from Illinois

None of that is ok.

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(312): Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there. (1-312): None of that is ok. http://tfl.nu/fi6r

Replies (38) Good night (5413) Bad night (3580)
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(740): View more from Ohio

His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.

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(740): His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them. http://tfl.nu/w51l

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(416): View more from Toronto

Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...

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(416): Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card... http://tfl.nu/vpen

Replies (9) Good night (4124) Bad night (793) Order T-Shirt
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(480): View more from Arizona

Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.

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(480): Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start. http://tfl.nu/ri6j

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(530): View more from California

Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine

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(530): Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine http://tfl.nu/asqo

Replies (36) Good night (2055) Bad night (4008) Order T-Shirt
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(585): View more from New York

if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.

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(585): if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes. http://tfl.nu/m1eq

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(269): View more from Michigan

he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing

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(269): he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing http://tfl.nu/dbp3

Replies (6) Good night (1194) Bad night (2354) Order T-Shirt
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(509): View more from Washington

Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.

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(509): Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival. http://tfl.nu/kooj

Replies (9) Good night (1566) Bad night (452) Order T-Shirt
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(847): View more from Illinois

Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?

(312): View more from Illinois

You're the best girlfriend ever.

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(847): Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over? (312): You're the best girlfriend ever. http://tfl.nu/ubhn

Replies (18) Good night (4406) Bad night (1078)
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(248): View more from Michigan

I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.

(1-248): View more from Michigan

I think we should measure in "bathtubs"

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(248): I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery. (1-248): I think we should measure in "bathtubs" http://tfl.nu/kzc7

Replies (3) Good night (1294) Bad night (346) Order T-Shirt

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