got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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