I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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