Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
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Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
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Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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