Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize