I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Nicole vs. Life
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
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