Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Randomize