What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize