The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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