What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
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i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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