pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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