My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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