& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize