Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
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I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
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Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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