her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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