You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
i was born a porn star she said
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
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