Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
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