Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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