Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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