Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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