i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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