Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
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