You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Randomize