Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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