her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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