That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
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I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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