I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
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