i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Too much gin, very little bucket
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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