Sponge bath it is.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
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so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
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how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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