man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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