What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i will never coherently bang her
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he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
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Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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