I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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