its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
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You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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