i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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