I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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