The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
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I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
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I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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