We're facebook friends in real life
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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