Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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